Seeking Significance in All the Wrong Places

A repost for those struggling moms or stay at home moms out there. Take heart, your mothering efforts matter!

Someone is trying to rob you. Right now. Where you sit.

At this very moment a thief is testing your back doors and basement windows. His focus is your family and he plans to steal the power and joy of your impact within it.

As a woman.

As a wife.

As a mom.

Can you see him? Maybe not, for he hasn’t donned a black ski mask. He isn’t carrying a gun, either. He’s wielding a number two pencil with a pink pearl eraser. And he’s replacing memories of that sweet exchange over breakfast with the ambitious schedule that followed it.

A pencil is erasing and leaving a blank page

Courtesy of


Friend, we are being robbed. Of peace, joy, and contentment. Of the opportunity to make a profound impact in our home.

“Hi, I’m Bethany.”

“Hi, I’m Jacki. So, what do you do, Bethany? Do you work?”

“I’m a stay-at-home mom.”

“Oh . . . “

Then Jacki goes on to describe her role as the artistic director of an important company and regales me with tales about her latest project. I’m riveted by her world, but I feel small. Insignificant. And I go home and lie awake at night restless with thoughts of missed opportunities and wasted talents.

Contentment. What do we know of it?

Please don’t misunderstand, this isn’t an archaic rant against women who work outside their home or have a career. (In this season of life, I work outside my home and have a “career.”)

This is about seeking significance beyond the blueprint of God’s plan for us.

It’s about falling prey to the temptation to love ourselves more than we love our families; to miss pouring into their lives because we’re too busy pouring into our own; to neglect our first call to sacrificially love those God has entrusted to us.

It’s about sacrificing our families on the altar of self fulfillment.

Friend, the enemy works hard to keep our planners full and our hearts empty. [Tweet “The enemy works hard to keep our planners full and our hearts empty.”] And he uses a spirit of discontent to pilfer our priorities so he can waltz in and gut our homes in plain daylight. He drives us farther and farther from the heart of our homes —

— to reach for more. More opportunities. More achievement. More me.


Of course he doesn’t call it that. He spins it with a “holy” twist, “You’re doing it for God, for others . . . “

I confess, at times I’ve bought this lie. I pray earnestly and seek God’s plan. I angst and analyze my life searching for clues to His will, when one glance at my plate would tell me all I need to know . . .

It is heaped with “me.”


A portrait of a woman holding a red calendar, who is sad because her agenda is full.

Courtesy of


When did we start believing we needed the world’s accolades to be complete?

When did we start believing that loving ourselves is more important than loving our families?

When did we start believing that simply being a woman, wife or mom is sub-par?

The enemy is a thief and he plans to rob you. He conspires to pack your life with everything but your divinely-designed destiny: To powerfully impact your world as a God-first woman, a loving wife, a committed mom. [Tweet “The enemy conspires to pack our life with everything but our divinely-designed destiny.”]

Friend, you ARE significant. In fact, you’re remarkable! An endangered species. You’re the real deal, wholly “organic.” You are a natural treasure glowing amidst a culture of “all man-made materials.”

And God has placed you within the specific sphere that He created for you–and only you–to impact. [Tweet “God has placed you within the specific sphere that He created for you–and only you–to impact.”] A place of significance, power, and joy.

So bar your doors and lock your windows. Take that thief’s pencil with its pink pearl eraser and toss it in the trash. And savor the privilege of your unique position as a woman of God called and equipped to love and empower your family.

For what could be more significant than a mom investing in the lives of those entrusted to her care?



What helps you say “no” to things that draw you away from investing in your family?

Comments 6

  1. Perfect timing. I just shared these same thoughts with my family. That sense that I gave 100 percent to my children, but in doing so…though I loved my role as mom…I was left behind in the work place. That feeling that I’m having the final curtain call in life and didn’t get a chance to say all my lines.

    You’re right. It’s the world, And the enemy, that chooses to rob my joy of all those sweet blessings, and the love that spills into my every day life…even now with empty nest. The question is: Who’s voice will I listen to each day?

    Great post!

    1. I find much peace in the fact that pouring ourselves out for our family is never a waste of time. On the contrary, I would very much regret having not invested in it.

  2. Love the questions in the middle, especially the first one. Used the ‘Click to Tweet.’ Very good. I don’t think this topic can be put out there too many times. It’s so cross-cultural and cross-generational. Glad to share it.

    1. I agree, the baseline truths cut across all cultural and generational lines. Thanks so much for sharing the post. 🙂

    1. Post

      Thanks! So glad it was helpful. 🙂 Trying to live it out, despite all the voices in our culture–and in my head–telling me I should be “doing something with my life.”

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